It’s a TV theme Bank Holiday Weekend – amended

FRIDAY: Casualty: In the midst of eldest sprog’s birthday, She Whom Must Be Obeyed slices large and deep cut into finger. Our Friend Who’s A Nurse drives SWMBO to The Royal London Hospital, home of HEMS, London’s Helicopter Emergency Medical Service and former residence and safe haven of John Merrick, otherwise known as The Elephant Man.

SATURDAY: The Bill: Following a family meal at Noodle Time, the six of us got off the Docklands Light Railway and crossed the road, just in time to be narrowly missed by a car screeching round the corner. The driver jumped out and ran towards us and then veered away to hide behind the van we were next to. A police Discovery sped past and the driver ran round the corner. The Discovery appeared again and, after a brief conversation with yours truly, sped off in pursuit.

SUNDAY: All Creatures Great And Small: Not content with sharing the flat and garden with five humans, four cats, two rabbits and two guinea pigs, SWMBO offered to dog-sit Daisie, who is a rescue from the Battersea Dogs Home, for friends who have gone back to Australia to visit family.

MONDAY – AMENDED: The Poseidon Adventure: I forgot that not only does it pee down with rain on every Bank Holiday Mondays but that there is invariably an old ’70s disaster movie on the TV in the afternoon during which the household will experience the type of emergency that requires one to summon out an emergency repair person at extortionate public holiday rates. Today was no exception, with a severely blocked waste pipe threatening to flood the kitchen. An hour or so of draining the sink and washing machine by hand, plunging and jetting the sink were to no avail. After trying our friendly neighbourhood guy (who was sensibly not answering). we called Pimlico Plumbers, the company which was featured in a recent UK fly-on-the-wall documentary series. Having previously been ripped off on a number of occasions by cowboys of the trade, we were impressed by the service we received. Although we were quoted up to 90 minutes to respond, a neatly unifromed chap named Bill arrived almost within the hour. Bill thankfully spared us the sucking of air through teeth and shaking of head that usually proceeds a financial fleecing and set to work, methodically working through the possibilities step by step until he finally found the blockage, explaining what he was up to each step of the way. All of this was done in a calm and efficient manner, requiring little input from me save for the making of tea and the discussing of the Olympics and English rugby. When finished, he showed us what he had done – and the muck he’d cleared – then clearly explained the small print on the work sheet and the breakdown of the charges which although not cheap were, in the event, not unreasonable considering the quality of service we had received.

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