Archive for May, 2008

Sometimes I wonder if I drink too much

Me Gigging
Having lived in London for 8 years, I can’t really gage anymore. When I first came to London, I had not been drinking for about 3 years. Nothing horrible…I just stopped one day in an effort to drop a few pounds and never started up again. So, when I came here, I was clean. Slowly, slowly, I started drinking.

Fast forward to the present and on the Saturday I had two pints before walking from Covent Garden to Great Eastern Street then another three pints of bitter at the gig. All of this over about a 5 hour period. Brits would call me a light drinker, however, Americans would say that I am binging.

Just a Perfect Day

PJ and I had a nice lunch in Trafalgar Square…Falafel from Just Falafel. Maybe it’s just me, but I think the quality has gone down a bit, which is a real shame. I liked the food and I like the folks that work there, but I have to be honest.

Eating Falafel

OR, what might have put me off the food was staring at the bloke with no pants on. (more…)

Motorcycle (bus lane) emptiness

Image courtesy of Adelarksl

Besides white van men, motorcyclists easily come top in the prestigious all-London “who can nearly knock Imran off his bike the most” championships.

So, some people might be a bit concerned that Major BoJo is proposing that motorcycles be allowed onto the thus-far hallowed turf of bus lanes.

Personally, I just love the challenge. But for all those of you who would like to see me live a little longer, please sign the petition to remind ‘cycling-friendly’ Boris that there are bigger dangers on the road than sodding bendy buses.

Image courtesy of Adelarks

A bit of a Blur

Yesterday, that is…a bit of a blur. Mostly ’cause I was hungover and shaking from the football the night before. It started out all nice and civilized with PJ and me playing our favorite game “Who’s Smoking the Ganja” in Lincoln’s Inn Fields. Sadly, it wasn’t me. But, seriously, we’ve taken to going out to work on the script, and this is a nice place. When PJ pisses me off, I just wrestle him to the ground. Lots of space to do that here.

PJ in the Park


Alexander Boris de Pfeffel, in his mother’s words


What the hey-hey? His family calls him Alexander.

“When I was three months pregnant, we travelled to Mexico City by Greyhound bus. It was very uncomfortable, I was desperately sick. We stayed with a man called Boris Litwin, who drew me aside and said: ‘You can’t travel back like this, here are two first-class air tickets’.

I was so grateful, I said: ‘Whatever the baby is, I shall call it Boris.'”

In fact, she named her firstborn Alexander Boris de Pfeffel.

Well, he can’t be a toff if his parents went to Mexico City on a Greyhound bus, surely?

Also I’m surprised that he’s so keen on the Routemaster, with his mother to remind him of the difficulties that disabled bus users face.

All this and more at The Telegraph.

Send off for Two Guys in a Van

Another bit of shameless self-promotion: my feature documentary “Tokyo Cowboys” wot I made with my partner Patrick Jackson will be screening at Cannes…well, sort of.

“Cannes in a Van” is the brain child of Andy, Si and Jamie: “Three blokes, a projector and a van, take on the big guns at Cannes in a new approach to guerrilla cinema. We screen the best selection of short-films from the cream of independent filmmaking to a receptive, captive audience.”

You can check out more about Cannes in a Van by going to their website.

But, the London connection: the boys are leaving for Cannes tomorrow night at 10 p.m. The send off party is from 7 p.m. Come join us to send the boys off in style and to help Tokyo Cowboys celebrate its voyage:

Cannes in a Van Send Off Drinks



See more LOLBorisez at I HAZ A LUNDUN! Please make more and submit them. I sense a rich vein of comedy here.

No Taxation without Representation

Today I got a council tax reminder notice saying that if I didn’t pay my late council tax within the next seven days I would be taken to court and incur an additional £95 court cost. It’s dire straights these days: I had to choose between paying the council tax or buying food this week. I chose food.

And speaking of food, has anyone else noticed it’s gone up? I dropped £12 today at Tescos for:

Toilet Paper
2 Fishes (where you have to skin, bone and chop off the head yourself ’cause it’s cheaper)
Honey (which PJ has in tea instead of sugar, which is bad for him)
2 apples
2 bagles

Anyway, called the Council to see if they could give me a reprieve. It’s an 0845 number, by the way, which I don’t understand ’cause it’s the government, right? At first the very nice lady said that she couldn’t help me because I’m not on income assistance. I told her that I couldn’t get on income assistance because I’m a foreigner and it’s illegal because of the visa and all. Eventually, she did help me. Gave me a 7 day extension before they take me to court.

The thing is that they didn’t have to help me at all because I’m not a voting citizen…I’m a foreigner, or did I say that already? I’m reminded that “no taxation without representation” was one of the reasons why American broke from this country to begin with. (All of you complaining about Boris…at least you got to vote.)

Then there’s the bank charges, but I don’t want to get into that yet. It’s too depressing.

You’re probably saying, “if you don’t like it then just go the hell home.” Well, honestly, at this point, I probably would. At least I can go on welfare and get food stamps back in the States. But because fuel prices are so high, I can’t afford the airfare.

Boris wins: we look like idiots


We love to mock the Americans for electing the clownish, idiotic George W. Bush: now we can boast the same honour.

By 140,000 votes (of 2,188,738), Boris Johnson is the elected leader of the largest electorate in Britain.

Here’s hoping that he’s neither the fool nor the bigot that he pretends to be. The Guardian calls it “his first really grown-up job“…and we all know how fun it is to work with a newbie.

I welcome your comments, especially disagreeing with me and welcoming a brave new Boris world: I sincerely hope you’re right.


Photo and graphic courtesy The Guardian

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