Archive for the ‘Television’ Category

A big X to you, Louis Walsh!

How many of you saw the X-Factor last night? I normally try to steer clear of it as Sharon and Louis get on my nerves but last night, I couldn’t escape on time. So I sat through Louis’ tripe and Sharon’s bleatings and could actually feel myself becoming sick. When Louis went ‘Simon was in America last week whilst I spent time with my acts’ for the gazillionth time, I felt like punching his teeth out. Couldn’t agree more with Simon’s ‘that was the problem – you should have been with me in America’. Look where all that mentoring got his acts – they were the ones who were at the bottom of the pile! Could all of those who are voting to keep the cheesier-than-cheese McDonalds Brothers, stop? Seriously, they are crap! Robert, IMHO, was waay better than them and poor Rob had to go last night. While we are at it, could we not have Sharon and Louis back next year please? Louis’s attitude and Sharon’s ‘divine mother’ act are seriously getting on my nerves. Neither of them have a clue about who’s the decent singer and it is getting increasingly annoying watching their double act.

Angel’s what?

Angel’s what?

Did anyone catch Masterchef Tuesday night (26-Sept)? Did you hear that lady going into raptures over Hardeep’s cooking and describe his
gnocchi as ‘angel’s fart’? What was that about? I think this has spoiled gnocchi forever for me! Angel or not, I will think of fart when I eat gnocchi next time – ick!

I thought the judges made the right decision by chucking Richard out. I like the bloke but he was rubbish last night. Whatever happened to Roger Black anyway – he went to absolute pieces! And Matt, dripping sweat all over the plates – double ick! I wonder if the judges knew that the food Matt served them was done with the sweat of his brow!

New Sony Bravia ad…

The ‘bouncy balls’ ad from Sony Bravia was probably my favorite television moment from last year, and I’m delighted to see that they’re making a sequel.

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I’m a little disappointed by the ‘look at us! we’re making a big, big ad!’ hoopla around it (I think ads about ads is a disappointingly self-indulgent trend nowadays), but, I must confess, it’s working. That’s a LOT of paint…

Michelle Scoops the Apprentice

While I can’t imagine why anyone would want to work in business, I was well pleased when Michelle Dewberry won BBC’s The Apprentice tonight. I loved the swearing, the fact that she supports her brothers and that she came from nothing and was making a 6 figure income before even coming on the show. She’s actually going to take a pay cut to work with Sir Alan Sugar.

I have been watching the show with PJ since the beginning, but I usually watch half of it with my hands over my face to protect myself from the horror. It’s amazingly compelling Reality TV. If it’s here to stay, this is what is should look like.

Big Brother…

So the Police now have acess to the Oyster Cards.

I was with my Mum who has one the other day, and I saw that it tells her what bus she got on, when and where she got off. I just dont like that.
Its one thing to track your mobile phone, your credit card and so on so forth… but please now your getting tracked to go to Icelands and back?

Obviously they are not tracking my Mum and her various shopping trips, however I still think its a liberty, make sure everyone gets the little peice of plastic with a bribe of cheaper bus travel, and hey! arent we smart, we got the movements of the whole of London if we decide we want them.

Londoners are the most watched people on the Planet and this is just another way to keep tabs on everyone. Im not a criminal, I have nothing to fear from them knowing where I have been. I just dont want them to.

The Simpsons

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Although I find a little dirty to give a shout out to a piece of advertising, I think this is phenomenal. Ad agency Devilfish has recreated the opening sequence to The Simpsons as a live action piece.

Entertaining both for the shot-by-shot match, and the insertion of quintessentially British backdrops (those fields Marge drives by are certainly not from any midwestern Springfield!), this is definitely worth taking a minute to view.

Big Brother Appeal

I recieved a mail this morning, redirected from Londons choice FM

Dear Big Brother Friend,

SOS – SAVE OUR SCIENCE

I Martin Jay of The Morning Vybe on Choice FM am thwarted with sadness due to the possibility that my mate Science may get evicted from the Big Brother House this Friday.

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We must prepare ourselves for world disasters such as Victoria Beckham releasing another tune, yet another resurrection of Dirty Den in Eastenders, Chelsea winning the premiership again next year or even Michael Barrymore making a TV comeback. I am sure you agree that having Maxwell the nose picking, scab feeding alcohol drinking, woman leering lout in the house one more week is right up there in the list of worse things that could happen in the world.

Please do your bit to stop this terrible tragedy occurring and vote for Maxwell to be evicted.

* text MAXWELL to 64404
(35p plus your STD network rate)
* call 09016 16 16 08
(calls cost 35p, mobie and other network rates may vary)
* hit your red button to vote on interactive TV
(votes cost 35p)

We only have a few hours to save Science so please send this email to asmany people as possible and do your bit to let justice prevail.

Save Our Science – Do the right thing!!!

Martin Jay Morning Vybe Show Presenter

TUNE INTO THE MORNING VYBE SHOW, WITH MARTIN & ASHA – WEEKDAYS BETWEEN 6AM TO 9AM TO HEAR MARTIN’S BIG BROTHER FEEDBACK!!

I found it so funny, I had to oblige…

OK…..*she said with fear*

Alright…

Im gonna start it..

Ill take the rotten tomatoes. Big Brother is back in London. Elstree to be precise….

I have to say I adore it all ready.But Im a sucker for reality TV, I remeber the first one was filmed at Three Mills, in the East End… I was there with my then also reality addicted Bloke Sean, in the rain, watching Nasty Nick Escape across the river. We were very cute and scrabbled around the Three Mills Vacinity.. trying to see, walking around that park until the action happened later in the day… Jeez I even had a picnic there. I was 19 please forgive me.

OK Im sad… but im comfortable with that. And toninght is tthe EVICTION… popcorn and vanilla coke at my house… hehehehe

ok.. now youu can attack if you must. *sigh*

It’s a TV theme Bank Holiday Weekend – amended

FRIDAY: Casualty: In the midst of eldest sprog’s birthday, She Whom Must Be Obeyed slices large and deep cut into finger. Our Friend Who’s A Nurse drives SWMBO to The Royal London Hospital, home of HEMS, London’s Helicopter Emergency Medical Service and former residence and safe haven of John Merrick, otherwise known as The Elephant Man.

SATURDAY: The Bill: Following a family meal at Noodle Time, the six of us got off the Docklands Light Railway and crossed the road, just in time to be narrowly missed by a car screeching round the corner. The driver jumped out and ran towards us and then veered away to hide behind the van we were next to. A police Discovery sped past and the driver ran round the corner. The Discovery appeared again and, after a brief conversation with yours truly, sped off in pursuit.

SUNDAY: All Creatures Great And Small: Not content with sharing the flat and garden with five humans, four cats, two rabbits and two guinea pigs, SWMBO offered to dog-sit Daisie, who is a rescue from the Battersea Dogs Home, for friends who have gone back to Australia to visit family.

MONDAY – AMENDED: The Poseidon Adventure: I forgot that not only does it pee down with rain on every Bank Holiday Mondays but that there is invariably an old ’70s disaster movie on the TV in the afternoon during which the household will experience the type of emergency that requires one to summon out an emergency repair person at extortionate public holiday rates. Today was no exception, with a severely blocked waste pipe threatening to flood the kitchen. An hour or so of draining the sink and washing machine by hand, plunging and jetting the sink were to no avail. After trying our friendly neighbourhood guy (who was sensibly not answering). we called Pimlico Plumbers, the company which was featured in a recent UK fly-on-the-wall documentary series. Having previously been ripped off on a number of occasions by cowboys of the trade, we were impressed by the service we received. Although we were quoted up to 90 minutes to respond, a neatly unifromed chap named Bill arrived almost within the hour. Bill thankfully spared us the sucking of air through teeth and shaking of head that usually proceeds a financial fleecing and set to work, methodically working through the possibilities step by step until he finally found the blockage, explaining what he was up to each step of the way. All of this was done in a calm and efficient manner, requiring little input from me save for the making of tea and the discussing of the Olympics and English rugby. When finished, he showed us what he had done – and the muck he’d cleared – then clearly explained the small print on the work sheet and the breakdown of the charges which although not cheap were, in the event, not unreasonable considering the quality of service we had received.

Does the UK really love Nadia from Big Brother?

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Introducing Nadia Almada, until this past December was a Portuguese gay man, and thanks to surgery, is now a straight Portuguese woman. Almost 4m people voted her the winner of this year’s Big Brother in the UK, which finished Friday – with 75% of the vote. I actually found myself moved to tears by her wild nervous reaction when she found out she won, because the main reason for her being there was a desire to be accepted as a woman, not from who she used to be.

In my wildest dreams I never thought a transsexual would be accepted by most of the UK public for much of anything. In truth, a lot of the tabloids didn’t know what to do with themselves when covering her popularity in the house – lots of mentioning of the Portu-GEEZER (fnaw, fnaw) in that tiresome play on words the papers provide for what they picture to be their typical readers. Yeah, there may be a transsexual character on one of the most popular soaps here, but she’s played by a woman, so is clearly not a threat to ratings. when the hostess of the show told evicted that she was a man, most of them were startled but were totally accepting, because they knew her as she was, not by what she used to be. But the hostess’ giddy revelation to housemates that Nadia used to be a man was really tacky, and she received loads of complaints about how she depicted her from other members of the public, only changing her tune in the 9th week of the show.

So did Nadia win because the voting public is incredibly tolerant of transsexuals, or is that too simplistic of a view? Here’s what I’ve figured out about British traits since moving here 12 years ago:

- they have been taught that making fun of foreigners is acceptable, because its just a bit of a laugh

- they tend to always support the underdog in any competition

- they tend to have a laissez-faire attitude towards eccentricity

- they are progressive when the law sometimes forces them to be

- young people (20 and under) are incredibly accepting and encouraged by people who are different in some way

So some conflicting views there. I am sure the votes that Nadia got were from loads of different demographics – any gay men and clued-up women I knew voted for Nadia because of her general queer and different identity. Younger people who watched it probably voted for her because she was genuine, and very capable of sticking up for herself in front of some of the nastier characters in the house. She also has no typical British control over her emotions – she can veer from hysterical laughter to hysterical crying in about 5 seconds – and seeing that kind of behaviour is refreshing for a lot of the public who tired of the poseurs and media whores in the house.

But on the other hand, using “fag” and “poof” are still incredibly common among schoolkids as the ultimate insult, gay people are still generally discriminated against outside of just a few major cities – so imagine how transsexuals would be treated, and like gay men depicted on TV 20 years ago, always as suicidal or dying of AIDS or both, there is no noticeable depiction of transsexuals anywhere.

I would like to think that the country has grown up a bit in general. Things have changed so dramatically here – where London used to feel in the dark ages socially (there was a popular theory when I arrived here in 1992 that if you don’t sleep with American gay men, you won’t be at risk of catching HIV) ease of travel and the internet have made a lot of people more aware of what is going on around the world. Younger people typically are far more aware of different types of people than their parents could ever be. So someone like Nadia was voted for despite the fact she is different, maybe this is what made her so appealing in the first place.

I wish her all the best and hope that her dream is fulfilled, that the woman she always wanted to be is the person that is understood and accepted by everyone who meets her.

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